Sunday, February 7

Seeing the Light

The phrase "seeing the light" has many different meanings.  As a photographer, seeing the light means really studying the source, direction, temperature, the effect on  your scene.

2016 for me is the year of the "new" me.  For a long time now I have been in a dark place in my life and it hasn't been very nice.  I've pretty much isolated myself and stayed inside, both figuratively and literally.....cut myself off from people who care about me.   The word "no" pretty much became my vocabulary.  I didn't realize it at the time, but it was dragging me deeper and deeper into the darkness.  This has been reflected in my work which has been dark and moody for a while now.  There is nothing wrong with dark and moody and I'm proud of the work I've been producing.  I just wondered if I'd ever do light and airy again.

I made myself a promise that this new year was going to be the start of a new me, in a lot of ways.  I'm not making promises that I know I won't be able to keep.  Every year I do that to myself and I realize now that it was just keeping me in the dark.  So this year, no resolutions to lose weight or any of that.  This year my resolution is to bring myself into the light.  And I'm doing that making baby steps.  My first baby step is to not have an excuse when my sisters or mom ask me to do things with them.  We used to go every weekend and discover new things to do but we've all had health issues over the last 18 months that have slowed us down.  In my case, I took the easy way out and began the isolation.  So I guess my actual first baby step was recognizing that I take the easy way out and trying to change that.

I was invited to my sister's to play cards last night and I actually went!  Baby step.  A step into the light................

It was an awesome evening.  We laughed and got caught up on "stuff" and it was wonderful.  I want to thank my sister Brenda, my best friend, for not giving up on me.   Even though I would say no or have an excuse, she never gave up asking.  And my are THE best mom in the world.  I don't know what I'd do without you.   My daughter, and Landon know what you mean to me...there are no words.

So, today is a good day.  The sun is shining (for now *grins*) and the Mountaineers won their basketball game and I feel good!

I would love to hear from you about where you are in life, or your photography, or just anything in general.  Have a breathtaking Sunday everyone and enjoy life!

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1 comment:

  1. This post spoke so clearly to me. I've been living in the dark for such a long time. The only time I feel like I"m in the light is when I am out with my now adult children but I can't depend on them to bring me out of the darkness. It's my responsibility. It's hard to take that first step when you feel so totally alone. So today I will take my first step and move toward the light. Thank you Pam for this post and as always for sharing your beautiful and inspiring work.


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